It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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