Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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