i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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