Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Randomize
