Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
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