so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
