don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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