I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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