I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
That accounts for only three of the penises
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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