Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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