This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
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