I faked an abortion last night.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
