so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
