i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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