we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
