And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
