we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
is that a dick in a sweater?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
Randomize
