Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
We need a shit load of segways right now
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
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