I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
