Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
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