Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
You just kept telling everyone to call you MFT.. Mother Fucking Tornado.
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