She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
