sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Randomize
