whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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