I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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