if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
she peed on how many people?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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