Me. At least after what I've been through.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
We need to get me chipped asap
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