p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
