Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
