do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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