Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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