I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize
