I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
