Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
