as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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