Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
