when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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