hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
he high fived his dick after we had sex
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
