i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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