I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
