You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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