Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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