found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
