what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
