Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
