let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
whose ass print is on the piano?
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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