Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I need moral support for this bender
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
Randomize
