idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
