Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
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