so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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